Tuesday, December 18, 2012

The Busy Holiday Season

What have I been up to?

October 20th, 2012 - Joint Spouses Convention
It was a great day with some of my friends. I took a yoga class, chocolate making class, photography class, and healthy cooking class. The guest speaker was Mrs. Hawaii 2012 Stacey Snee - Former Navy, Navy Spouse, Mother, and more!

October 31st, 2012 - Threw a Halloween Party
I dressed up like a panda... everyone that didn't come in costume got to "create" a costume out of a grab box, and we had a delicious potluck style dinner while watching movies on the driveway and handing out candy.

November 8th, 2012 - The USMC Ball
Here's the outfit ladies... Thanks for your input.

November 12th, 2012 - A Day on the Water
We hit up Hickam Beach for a nice relaxing day of SUPing.

November 22nd, 2012 - Thanksgiving Dinner at our House
We hosted dinner at our house this year, we had a great spread and a wonderful time with friends.

December 1st, 2012 - The Electric Light Parade
We went to Honolulu City Light's Opening night parade.
December 2nd, 2012 - Tree & Lights
We had a grand adventure at the Helemano Tree Farm, once we got home we decorated the tree & house!
December 15th, 2012 - The Boat Parade
Most recently we went to the Festival of Lights Boat Parade with a group of friends.

Between all of the fun events with friends -
  • I've had 14 photo shoots- family, maternity, newborns, homecomings, Christmas, etc!
  • I'm trying to finish up my current photography course by the deadline (self-paced) of Jan 16th!
  • I'm planning a Christmas Cookie Tasting Party
  • I have one more photo shoot on the books before Christmas and one directly after New Years
  • We've had friends from our last duty station arrive on island and want to spend time with them
  • Hubby will be standing up for deployment again in January so trying to soak in time with him!
How is your holiday season going?
As busy as mine?
 I can't believe Christmas is only a week away!

Wednesday, October 17, 2012


We headed down to the local pumpkin patch this past weekend to enjoy some good "country" fun. We got fresh squeezed lemonade, chili/rice or hamburger/rice bowls, fresh picked and roasted sweet corn, and of course the best two pumpkins in the entire patch! *I kid, I kid... but they're pretty nice looking. It was fun to look down the rows of corn and see the ocean, then look up into the mountain and see the changing of the leaves in some of the trees.

I had posted a photo on my personal facebook and many people on the mainland made comments such as "Hawaiian pumpkins?" "Oh, I'm glad there are pumpkins there!" etc. Now, I do understand we live in the middle of the ocean, but we do have pumpkins and Christmas trees for that matter! It made me laugh, we aren't deprived (unless you count Chick fil'a or Chipotle =p ), so don't worry about us too much. I know many people in the military don't... but I LOVE living here, I even asked my husband if we can't extend this tour if there was a possibility of coming back later in his career.

Last note- The Joint Spouses Conference is THIS Saturday, who is excited? This girl! Will you be there? Please let me know, I'd love to meet you.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Dictating our lives

I have literally filled this text box to the max and "ctrl-a,  del" so many times now that I can't remember... I know there will be people that don't sympathize using the age old argument, "well you knew what you were getting into when you married him." But in this case I cry "lie!" I had no idea that the military would dictate my friendships, the social circle I could be in, who I am allowed & not allowed to go out to dinner with, etc. I knew that officers & enlisted friendships were a no-no, what I was't aware of is the inner breakdown...
  • Junior Enlisted
  • NCOs
  • SNCOs
  • Warrant Officer
  • (Then obviously officers...)
My husband recently got promoted; however, with this promotion & the upcoming "wet down" there have been multiple briefings on company fraternization. Basically how it was broken down to us is - even though you've been friends with so&so, hung out with them at the beach, had them over for dinner... Since you are in two different inner enlisted groups that has to end. Wow. 1.5-3yrs of friendship just cut-off. Like we aren't emotionally invested. Like we aren't humans, just the chevrons on my husband's collar/arm. The worst part is that they are telling us it doesn't matter what branch of service either, so our best friends in the Coast Guard & Navy somehow count as well. *sigh*

But I know somewhere one of you is saying "but wives don't count!" Or "stop wearing your husband's rank you aren't in the military, he is!" Am I right, were you the one saying/thinking that? While this IS true, while I do know women married to men of every rank, including officers, the hurt and separation still remains. While the men are deployed it's easy - we hang out, go for brunch, have ladies nights. But the entire dynamic changes when they return... Someone married to an E-4 simply cannot go out on a double date with someone married to an E-7 within the same company. So that best friend you made during deployment can be your best friend only if your husband's never hang out. Which no offense to her but I enjoy going out on group dates, hanging out with mutual friends. I love girl time, but when my husband is home (which seems so rare lately) I want to hang out with him too!

We have "family day" coming up... I never used to complain about company events, I thought it was nice to meet the other wives in the battalion... But this time around I'm being selfish and absolutely don't want to go. I don't want to make anymore "friends" that I'm technically not allowed to hang out with while our husbands are involved.

Today the USMC fraternization policy is really bringing me down. I don't know who initially got in trouble in my husband's battalion & brought this hammer down... But even though I love Hawaii, I'm desperately missing the camaraderie we had at our last duty station.

Have any of you been at a unit with such a focus (or crack down) on the company fraternization? 
If so, how did you handle it gracefully?