Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Skinnie Secrets #2 - STRESS!

Secret #2

I don't handle stress well, at all. I honestly think all that's been happening to me lately has to do with that... honestly, I went almost 25yrs without any acid/reflux problems then all of a sudden - bam! It's interesting though, before this PCS I worried about things, but they didn't affect me physically (at least not to my knowledge) but ever since we got orders to move here I haven't slept a whole night through, I physically get sick (ie- diaherra/vomiting) when thinking about big decisions, every decision is twice as hard because I'm so far from family, lately it's been the desire to have a job. Financially, I don't need to have a job- we have this one income thing down as well as you can. I think in my head the fact that I have a bachelor's degree and nothing to show for it makes me think I need a job to prove something. But right now a job is causing the most stress... (FYI- I went to the ER a day before a job interview, my husband had to call and cancel/explain the situation for me... and I'm suppose to have an interview next Wednesday) but after talking to my mom I really do think it's the cause of all my troubles. I'm worried that if I take the job I won't get to spend time with my husband before he deploys, I won't be able to travel home for Christmas, I won't be able to spend time with my parents when they visit, and more.

Right now I think I need to focus on me.

I need to spend as much time as the Marine Corps will allow us before my husband deploys. I need to volunteer for things I like, not just apply for jobs that I know I can do but don't have a passion for. I need to get involved at church, especially getting back into the Bible. I need to work on getting healthy again- mainly exercising more. I need to do things I like that make me happy. I want to have the flexibility of going home... seeing my family once every 7-9mo isn't really ideal. I need to make some good solid friendships to have while my husband is away.

Anyone have tips on dealing with stress?
Stay at home wives- what keeps you going?
Bible verses?


  1. I am right there with you on this. I'm not going to lie, but I'm a worry-wart and in return it makes me stressful. Right now with DH being deployed, being alone, parents in another continent, job i hate and much more make me stress out. I think we can all handle stress, but its how we handle it. before DH and I got married and while i was in grad school i was so stressed out that i was shedding way more than usual. There was a lot more to the stress: grad school, going through immigration, personal problems within my family, DH and i living apart, planning a wedding overseas. in the end i was POOPED!
    usually stress does me no good. actually, it does no one any good. i loose sleep, don't eat well, etc.

    since i work and volunteer it gets me out of the house. work i hate, but its something and i love my volunteering.

    i know this may sound stupid, but i'm not going to lie. what gets me going through this deployment is my dog. she's the one who greets me so excited...either that or she's excited to see me because that means she can go pee, lol. but honestly, the feeling of feeling welcomed. obviously, when DH isn't deployed its him and the dog...seriously :)

    take all the time you need to spend with your hubby before he deploys. i did that and made sure of that before he leaves.

    hope you feel better soon!

  2. I totally understand what you mean when you say that because you have a degree, you feel like you should have a job to show for it. I really struggle with that. I know that right now my job is to stay at home with our babes and raise them up, but it still can get to my head and I can start feeling bad that I'm not contributing to our finances at all. It all goes back to money for me, sad to say.

    Dealing with stress tips? Exercise, eating healthy, having my share of alone time (but then again, I am always and constantly surrounded by babies and their needs, so alone time is such a break!), getting in solid woman conversation time and spending quality time with my husband. But that's just for me. You might find that it's different for you.

    I think that what you talked about doing - getting involved at church, volunteering - are all such good things. Especially because it still allows you the flexibility you want to spend time with your husband, particularly before he deploys - time is so precious, in my mind.

    Sorry you've been so stressed - hoping things get better :) Just remember that God has your best in mind and lean on Him.

  3. I think stress comes with being married to the military.

    Whenever I get stressed I run it out. There is something powerful about exercising. 1. It is totally good for you 2. Gives you time to clear your head and get out your frustrations 3. Releases endorphins which help improve your mood and outlook.

    I also totally understand about the job thing. I too have a degree and am currently staying home. When my husband was deployed I volunteered to be the unit FRG leader and also got involved in our Spouse's club. Both of these things not only kept me busy but they also helped me meet some new people and forge new friendships.

    Stress can have many negative effects on your body so once you find out what works for you your body might respond in a positive way!

  4. Stress physically gets to me too, even if I don't believe I am stressed! Before we got married and Ryan was in Iraq I had this weird stomach issue that they just could not figure out. It has faded and I take medication but it is still a mysterious thing but I think stress has a whole lot to do with it.

    I try and just tell myself to breathe. To focus on important things and keep my energy in the right places. I know working out helps a lot of people, as does eating right.

    Good luck!

  5. I just wanted to say that I know how that is! Stress gets to me physically every time- insomnia, no appetite, pain, etc. It's no fun at all! Focus on not what you think you 'should do' with a job, but on what will give you happiness and peace. Prayers!

  6. Praying for you! Definitely focus on what is best for you, hope all works out well! xoxo

  7. I wouldn't worry about the job. When Matt was deployed both times I didnt work. The first time was before we had Riley and the only thing I wish would have been different is if maybe I had done some volunteer work or something to make me feel needed somewhere.

    Hope things get better!


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